TV RECAP: ‘Once Upon a Time’ Ep. 311: ‘Go Home’

Originally published on The Flickcast.  16 December 2013.

It has been a very long and exhausting(ly boring) half a season of Once Upon a Time, Oncers. But we made it! We braved the Neverland forest of perpetual setbacks and sides stories. We survived the onslaught of emotional baggage from everyone from the unusual suspects (Snow & Charming) to we-expect-better-from-you characters (Rumple).

We even managed to stay tuned in while a slew of new faces joined this entirely too large cast and enjoyed some (Ariel) while questioning the purpose of others (Tink). So now, Peter Pan’s twisted tale comes to a close, Rumple finds his courage and Emma gets to change her mind about a life-altering decision. Time for us all to go home…

Felix and fake Pan drop random vials of magic from Regina’s vault into Storybrooke’s well. But as we all recall, in order for the curse to work you have to supply the heart of the thing you love most. For Pan it’s not Rumple but Felix (a friendship/loyalty kind of love, just so we’re clear). The Lost Boy isn’t so sure about this plan and can’t we talk about this…Nope. He heart is ripped out and crushed into the well.

This is all while Gold is explaining to the main cast that the new curse will follow Pan’s evil machinations, just like the old curse did Regina’s. The solution is twofold: First, switch Pan and Henry back to their bodies, which requires the Black Fairy’s wand. Second, get the scroll back and Regina can cancel the new curse. A plan in place the team breaks their huddle while green smoke billows up from the well. Credits.

In the first of far too many flashbacks this evening, Blue reassures Charming and Snow that their daughter will be the Savior and everything will be peachy. For two people who also spout this kind of gushy optimism, they are unfairly grouchy about the fairy’s blanket optimism. However it does give Charming the chance to speak the episode’s tagline: Happy endings aren’t always what we expect.

In Gold’s shop, Snow reminisces with Emma over her old mobile. The two bond further over having both tried to do what was best for their kid by sending them away. In more important news, Rumple is nearly ready to perform the switchback spell as soon as he gets the Black Fairy’s wand. Tink, Neal, Hook and Charming are working on that at the church, where the Blue Fairy’s body is laid out for mourners. Looking to pay his respects, the Shadow swoops in upon the Wand Retrieval Unit. Commercial.

TV RECAP: ‘Once Upon a Time’ Ep. 310: ‘The New Neverland’

Originally published on The Flickcast.  9 December 2013.

We are nearly at the end of this incredibly long (for us anyway) Neverland journey Oncers. Our heroes and some villains have returned to Storybrooke to reunite with all of the secondary character we know, love and miss. But of course, that wily Peter Pan keeps up his scheming even while trapped in Henry baby faced, yet suddenly much taller, body.

The episode opens on the quaint town of Storybrooke where nothing strange happens as long as everyone important is away. Belle takes Ariel to the docks where the mermaid instantly locks lips with hunky fisherman Eric. It feels appropriate to again point out that these two knew each for literally three minutes. But this is all just set up for the Jolly Roger to appear in the sky and swoop toward the dock. Credits.

The whole town has instantly gathered to applaud the arrival of the people they earlier said they didn’t actually miss. While everyone else gets hugs and kisses, Regina stands all alone. Snow throws her a well-deserved bone by saying for all to hear that they made it back because of the Queen.

Flashback to Regina interrupting the Charming wedding from the Pilot episode. After the ceremony, Snow is angry as hell about her big day being disturbed. Charming says the real way to stick it to Regina is to enjoy their honeymoon as soon as possible and I think we all know what’s really on his mind. The newlyweds share a genuinely cute scene together where Charming steals a kiss and I’m reminded that sometimes these two actually have on screen chemistry. Snow chooses the Summer Palace as their destination, later revealing privately to Grumpy that there’s something there that can help them defeat Regina.

TV RECAP: ‘Once Upon a Time’ Ep. 309: ‘Save Henry’

Originally published on The Flickcast.  2 December 2013.

It’s been two weeks since the last episode of Once Upon a Time but, just like this entire half season, it’s felt much longer. Just in case you forgot, last time on Once, Henry stopped using his brain and gave Pan his heart. The little snot is now on the path to immortality and phenomenal cosmic power! (Itty bitty living space to come later.)

Oh and because the Once family tree wasn’t weird enough, Pan is Rumple’s crappy father and also trapped him in Pandora’s Box. This week, Henry’s heart-lessness is resolved rather speedily, Regina remembers her maternal roots and out mothers both Emma and Snow, and Pan proves his much more than a one trick pony.

We start with a flashback to the Enchanted Forest. The curse is billowing toward the castle and Regina poofs into the dungeon where Rumple’s being held. She’s come to gloat about having cast the curse, which really makes no sense because he egged her on to do it. He just wants to pour salt in the open wound that is Regina killing her father to cast the curse.

As always, the Queen is masking her pain with swagger, saying she feels invincible even in the face of Rumple’s revelation about the Charmings’ savoir baby. He gets in one last dig before she skips off to gloat over Snow. “There’s a hole in your heart and someday you will come to me to fill it,” he sneers. Credits.

Henry’s mixed up family is trying to revive the boy, which is proving difficult because his heart is soaring off with Pan right about now.

Eleven years ago, Regina was facing a different tumultuous situation. She reveals to therapist Archie that she’s “feeling nothing.” Even a cricket turned psychiatrist can figure out it’s because the Queen Mayor is lonely. When Regina mentions she didn’t feel that aching emptiness when little boy Owen was around, Archie suggests she look into adopting a child.

Logically this means going to speak with Mr. Gold. Upon being asked to help Regina get a child: “Well I’m flattered but uninterested.” I love these two so much.

Gold agrees to help her find a child but cautions her that just because she wants a child, doesn’t mean she’s ready to have one. Nice PSA Once! Parents have to put their kids first, he reminds her, and selflessness has never been Regina’s strong suit.

TV RECAP: ‘Once Upon a Time’ Ep. 308: ‘Think Lovely Thoughts’

Originally published on The Flickcast.  18 November 2013.

In an incredibly surprising turn of events, there is once again forward momentum on Once Upon a Time! Henry’s family even finds the kid and we get a nice bit of background for my beloved Rumplestiltskin. Sadly, “Think Lovely Thoughts” is also so packed with contrivances it dulls the otherwise tasty plot developments.

Everything from Pan’s origin story (especially the source of his name) to Henry’s inexplicable stupidity made me cringe, dear Oncers. But still we carry on, so let’s begin with a flashback, shall we?

A card hustler gets beaten up and robbed after swindling one too many customers. His son tries to intervene with the help of his adorable eyes and precious Scottish accent but it’s no use. Dad is a deadbeat for poor baby Rumple.

In Neverland, Pan reminds Henry that saving magic will save Wendy and everyone else. Henry, clearly being driven by hormones and a childish fantasy to be the hero like in his fairytale book, says he’s ready to do his duty.

Thankfully two members of his family still have some sense. Regina and Rumple make their way toward Pan’s camp. The Queen pays her master a compliment, saying, “You know despite our differences I can always count on you to get things done. Which is more than I can say for them.” She means the Charmings of course and dang is she right. Ten minutes with Rumple and they had an artifact to take down Pan.

Seven weeks (for us) with the Charmings and all they got was a very convoluted plan. But back to their conversation. Regina brings up Neal, which Rumple doesn’t want to talk about. Good choice really because once she finds out you rescued her son and then let him get recaptured, your little alliance will be fireballed to hell.

We flashback again to see Rumple’s dad dropping him off with two spinner ladies. The boy doesn’t want to leave his Papa so to cheer him up, Dad gives him the going-to-be-important later-on wicker doll. Then Papa runs out of the cottage before he son’s even given the doll a name.

Neverland. Charmings and Co head towards Pan’s camp and Snow confesses to Emma that she’ll stay on the island with her hubby. Emma is skeptical about how easily Mom gave up on finding a solution to this problem. She fails to mention or even think that her newfound magic powers could be helpful but Emma says she’s giving up. But that’s what we have Regina and Rumple for and luckily the duo stumble upon everyone else.

Neal ruins this happy reunion by spilling the beans about the prophecy. Everyone takes a dramatic step back from Rumple and draws their weapons. The Dark One looks exasperated while different members of his complicated family accuse him of trying to kill the kid. Everyone including Hook is ready to defend Henry. Rumple (and I) rolls his eyes at their stupidity. Commercial.

TV RECAP: ‘Once Upon a Time’ Ep. 306: ‘Ariel’

Originally published on The Flickcast.  5 November 2013.

I have to tell you Oncers, I’m starting to worry about our magical show. We spend yet another episode in Neverland and seem to get very little accomplished once again toward the goal of rescuing Henry (who doesn’t even appear in “Ariel” though that might be an improvement really). We do however get confirmation yet again that Regina is the best character (and actress) on Once and that Rumple hasn’t completely lost his ability to put together a deal or a plan. Oh and of course, there’s Ariel, whose flashback story is really somewhat pointless until the plot at then end calls for her.

So we start in the old Enchanted Forest where Snow White is running away from Regina’s guards.  She skids to a halt at a cliff overlooking the ocean but then takes a daring leap into the waters where she is recued by a red-headed mermaid, Ariel.

In Neverland, Regina is pushing Emma to concentrate to use her magic. Ms. Savior doesn’t want to use her anger as a trigger, which makes sense since she was about to use love every other time but she apparently doesn’t remember that. See, Rumple, this is why they need you. The Queen is disgusted with Emma’s reluctance, saying, “You’re such a pathetic waste of ability.” This fires up Emma’s temper and the campfire she was trying to magic.

Regina is pleased while Emma’s parents are trying not to be too mortified. They get a nice bit of distraction from Hook who, in a show of surprising honesty, tells them about Neal. While the men agree that not telling Emma until they’re sure about Neal’s alive or dead state, Snow feels uncomfortable lying to her daughter. Personally, I think she should embrace this opportunity to make up for missed chances to lie to her kid about things like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny.

Back in the Enchanted Forest, Ariel and Snow gab about boys. Seems the mermaid fell in love at first sight with land-Prince Eric when she saved him from a shipwreck a year ago. She also reveals that she’s got plans for a night on two legs by lifts her fins onto the land where they transform. Apparently, the sea witch Ursula grants mermaids the ability to have legs for 12 hours every high tide and this one coincides with Ursula’s Ball, which Eric will attend.

Neverland. The Charmings and Hook are trying to make a getaway from the camp but their poor planning makes Emma suspicious. So Snow just blurts it out: Neal’s alive.

After commercial, we get some quality time with Rumple, who is struggling to see into future. Then Pan pops up to offer him some breakfast and inform the dealmaker that he can’t see the future in a place where time stands still. Duh. He tells Rumple to just leave the island because even if he saved Neal and Henry no one will forgive him for all the evil he’s done. Go back to Belle and make a new start, Pan advises.

While Rumple contemplates his cowardice, the company is arguing about looking for Neal. Regina, once again speaking for the audience, says, “This is a waste of time.” Snow tells Emma that she owes it to Henry and herself to find out if Neal’s alive but the Queen is fed up with making no progress on finding their son. She goes off on her own while everyone else heads off to find Neal. They better hurry too because as Pan and Felix watch them from afar, it’s decided to move the captive Neal to the Echo Cave.

Once Upon A Time In Wonderland Says “Forget Me Not” In This Week’s Episode

Originally published on PopWrapped.  25 October 2013.

Oh Wonders, we’re back again for another jaunt through Wonderland or in the case of this episode, Underland. Alice remains steadfast in her search for Cyrus just as Will remains the most entertaining part of this show. The writers apparently predicted this because tonight’s episode is all about our beloved Knave. We get some juicy info on his thieving past and the Anastasia who broke his heart (Spoilers: It’s not Disney’s Anastasia). We also get a well-publicized cameo from Once’s blonde Robin Hood.

This episode is a fun one especially since it focuses so much on Will and so little on Alice. Also, Jafar doesn’t look quite so ridiculous (although next week’s previews show an unfortunate change in hair style). So, let’s jump in to Once Upon a Time in Wonderland’s “Forget Me Not.”

“A few years ago,” as the title reads, a horse drawn carriage stops to help some screaming men in the roadway. A man is down with a broken leg and as they tend to him, someone else silently drops from the sky and snags the carriage’s loot. Later Robin Hood congratulates his Merry Men on a fine ruse and they welcome the man who snagged to the loot as their newest member: Will Scarlet aka The Knave of Hearts.

In present day Wonderland, Will thinks it’s safer for he and Alice to split up but she thinks they should stay together. Turns out she’s right because he has the idea to seek out the Forget-me-knot. This magical item when held over any area will show what last happened there. It would show them who dug up Cyrus’ bottle and give them something to do considering right now they’re just wandering around.

In Cyrus’ Cave of Woes, Jafar and the Red Queen are having a feast while the genie looks on. Jafar taunts him with Alice’s paper crane and utters the words Wonderland has been dancing around for two weeks now:  “Magic always comes with a price.” Tonight’s price will be forcing Alice to make her first wish.

Will and Alice arrive at the Caterpillars abode. He’s the one with the Forget-me-knot and a bounty on Will’s head. No biggie, the Knave assures Alice. This Underland is his world. Everything will be fine! Yeah. The pair have been in this Underland for barely a minute when they’re held at sword and dagger point. But the Caterpillar, not fancying his Knave skewered, bids them approach his smoking couch.

They try to work out a deal with Mr. Caterpillar, who slimily suggests Alice as the form of Will’s payment toward his debt. Anyone else having Jabba the Hutt with Han and Leia thoughts here? Anyway, Alice uses her smarts to deduce that the Caterpillar doesn’t have the Knot but he does know where it is: with the Grendel. The new deal is they retrieve the knot, bring it and Will’s debt is paid. Bonus for the Caterpillar is if Will tries to keep the magical item, his head gets to become the newest pretty decoration on the Caterpillar’s desk. Win-win-win.

TV RECAP: ‘Once Upon a Time’ – Ep. 303: ‘Quite an Uncommon Fairy’

Originally published on The Flickcast.  14 October 2013.

A big new character debuts tonight but will she be the cute, charming Tinker Bell that lights up the Disney castle or the snotty one who nearly got Wendy and Peter killed? Let’s find out Oncers…

Our company once again traipses through the woods. Charming is struggling to keep up and Snow teases him, “David Nolan let himself go?” Just as they’re getting close to the camp, as indicated by the map, it moves. As the bickering about what to do next starts up, Hook helpfully suggests they seek out a fairy he knew in Neverland. She might be able to help them find Henry/take care of Pan.

The leader of the Lost Boys is currently waking up Henry with the offering of an apple. Henry refuses the treat. “It’s a family thing,” he says. But Pan only wants him to use it for target practice. Henry is egged on to shoot a poisoned arrow at an apple on Felix’s head. He wisely tries to shoot Pan instead, who deftly catches the arrow and looks rather pleased with Henry’s decision.

Cut to the Dark Castle where Neal is frantically looking for something to use to make a portal to Neverland. He deduces that Henry must be the boy Pan was looking for all that time ago. The loud rummaging has summoned Robin Hood’s men, including Little John. He shows up with Robin’s son in tow and Neal suddenly has an idea.

We flashback to the Enchanted Forest from long ago where Rumple interrupts Regina’s lunch. She missed her lesson today and is thinking of giving up on them altogether. A future like Rumple’s doesn’t appeal to her and she’s already most of the way there. She’s unhappy with her marriage and everything else in her life. He insists she keep up with her learning dark magic before vanishing. In a fit of frustration, Regina she bangs on the balcony railing, which gives way. She plummets towards the ground but a cloud of magical dust catches her. She’s just been saved by Tinker Bell.