Ah Wonderers, I am so glad to be among you! Thank you to Emmy Rivera for filling in for me while I was sick last week. And what an episode last week! Will’s now the Red Queen’s genie, Lizard’s dead (apparently), Cyrus and Alice are finally engaged and Jafar has maybe gotten more than he bargained for with the Jabberwocky. Let’s learn what “Dirty Little Secrets” everyone is hiding.
What you need to know:
Long ago in Agrabah: Cyrus cheats at a card game and his opponents get their revenge by setting his house on fire while his mother is inside. To save their badly burned mama, Cyrus convinces his two brothers to go with him to the Well of Wonders. They fill their canteens with water but are grabbed by an Inferi before they leave. Ok, it’s actually the Guardian of the Well but whatever. She tells them that their mother is already destined to die so the water won’t help. Cyrus, perhaps motivated mostly by guilt, convinces his brothers to take the water despite the “price” they may have to pay. They’re able to revive their mother, who turns out to be Amara, Jafar’s future mentor/lover/snake staff! She hardly has time to admire her satiny skin before the Guardian arrives, transforms her boys into genies and shoots their bottles off we know not where.
Well well: Distraught that Jafar has his brothers (and that he didn’t realize it before now) Cyrus decides he must go the Well of Wonders to break their genie curse. Then Jafar’s nefarious plan will fail anyway. As luck would have it, Wonderland has a Well of its own so Cyrus and Alice go well wishing. To get there they have to choose between two red doors in the forest, both guarded by a single, riddle-loving knight. Though she initially tries to annoy him into helping, Alice eventually deduces that the knight is a liar. By asking him if one door leads to the Well she’s able to find the right path, which Cyrus decides to take alone. He meets the Guardian of the Well once more and begs for his brothers’ release but this is only possible if the water they stole is returned. Cyrus is all confused because surely his mother is dead by now but nope! She’s alive somewhere and now he’s got to find her.
Jabberstalky: Jafar’s new partner in terror strolls through the village and scares the life out of a poor man. Literally, he keels over from being scared to death. Ms. Jabber finds the (sadly) dead Lizard and brings Jafar Lizard’s eyes. Ew! He uses them to find out that the Queen now has the genie so Jabber goes after her instead. She finds Queenie in the forest, having just left the White Rabbit’s home with Will where they were convincing the hare to help them yet again. Queenie ordered Will back in his bottle but it doesn’t help. Neither does impaling the Jabberwocky with a sword. Jabber head butts Her Majesty and takes the bottle.
Mind games: The Queen and Will are now Jafar’s prisoners but she thinks she has the upper hand. She only cares about herself and Will and neither of them can be killed (Will because he’s a genie and the Queen because Jafar needs her to make her three wishes). She’s nearly able to wish Jafar out of Wonderland but the sorcerer steals her voice just in time. Then he unleashes the Jabberwocky to psychologically torment the Queen with her most secret fears: losing Will, being alone, and living a life of fear. It’s not until Jabber and Jafar start to hurt Will though that the Queen breaks. She gives in to Jabber’s demands to wish for her crown, her jewels and, finally, for Jabber to stop. The wishes granted, Will returns to his bottle, much to Jafar’s pleasure. He takes all three bottles and opens his spell book to begin his evil plan.
Next week, we hunt for Will’s heart and that means the return of Barbara Hershey as the wickedly wonderful Queen of Hearts, aka Regina’ mom. Finally!
Rabbit Trails
The Jabberwocky, explaining what she’s brought Jafar: “A parting glance” aka Lizard’s eyes.
Jafar’s borderline seductive line to the Jabberwocky, “I like a girl who thinks on her feet,” was a new level of weird-creepy.
Proving once again that they’re much better at writing for villains than heroes, Wonderland’s writers (who are also Once Upon a Time’s writers) give the Jabberwocky several perfectly menacing lines. Her chilling reply to a man’s concern about how quickly she’ll be able to get to the river, how she’ll kill his family and whether she’ll spare his baby? “Very fast, very slow and no.”
The Queen: “If the Jabberwocky has been released it’s not safe for any of us to be out in the open.”
Will: “I can’t help but notice we’re still out in the open.”
The Jabberwocky mentions that the Queen was passed over by a Prince in favor of her stepsister. Could her stepsister be Cora aka Regina’s mother, the Queen of Hearts? Or it is someone we haven’t met yet?
I suppose I should’ve seen it coming that Amara was Cyrus’ mother, considering the genie was raised in Agrabah like Jafar. But I truly didn’t and it’s a twist I very much approve of.
The Tweedle who didn’t betray the Queen has been hiding in the palace. He brings her food and tries to break her out of her cell but the traumatized Queen instead tells him to warn all of Wonderland to leave before Jafar and the Jabberwocky unleash their evil. She may not have held out long against the villains but at least she’s still trying to do the right thing.
Despite again having her crown and jewels, I feel like I should really start calling the Queen Anastasia. Thoughts?
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